Prayer for today - praying the scripture Psalm 25. Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The troubles of my heart habe multiplied; free me from my anguish. Look upon my affliction and my distress and take away all my sins. For the sake of your name, YHVH, … Continue reading Prayer for Today: Psalm 25
You can't lie...scheme.... sneak...and scam....or do things that purposefully hurt/mislead someone and expect the blessings of God to fall on you. It doesn't work that way. Pettiness (and/or being an a-hole)...though funny (at times)...is not a quality that should be celebrated or cultivated in the hearts of those claiming to follow God. If you retaliate … Continue reading Heart Check
"Your wickedness will punish you; your backsliding will rebuke you. Consider then and realize how evil and bitter it is for you when you forsake your God and have no awe of Me," declares [YHVH], the Lord Almighty." Jeremiah 2:19 "I will pass judgement on you because you say, 'I have not sinned'." Jeremiah 2:35 … Continue reading But…I’m Perfect!
She wanted her to open her mouth and say, "I want you..." She wanted her... to confess her fantasies and dwell in her desire... She wanted her to want her... as much as she did. She wanted. ...and wanted. ...and wanted. But, it didn't matter. Because she knew all she'd ever get was a platonic … Continue reading The Wanting
I’m imperfect. Part of my imperfection comes from a “thorn in my flesh” (2 Corinth 12:7) in the form of Bipolar Disorder, which greatly affects my relationship with the Most-High. The other part of my imperfection is the result of being human (Roman 3:23) and growing up with flawed human influences, in flawed churches, run by flawed leaders, who promote legalism and traditions over the true love of God (Mark 7:7-9). That’s why it was so difficult to develop a real relationship. Who wants to develop a relationship with someone they feel is constantly judging and condemning them? Who wants to serve someone under the threat of hell-fire and damnation? Though I talked about God’s love, I didn’t feel loved. I felt unworthy, unable, and ultimately doomed. I knew, deep within, my heart just wasn’t in it. Instead of freedom, peace, and security, I felt restricted and bound in religion. I lived in a constant state of fear over everything I did or thought that was wrong. I’d agonize if I’d ever make it to heaven. I’m believe in authenticity - good, bad, ugly, or otherwise. I don’t like putting on heirs and presenting myself to be someone I’m not – especially as it’s related to God. I’d been down that road before, twice, and it always left me feeling conflicted and hypocritical. Yet, no one saw through my façade, I was welcomed, accepted, encouraged, even praised (both times); and while I may have been able to fool others, I couldn’t fool my own heart – or God (Jeremiah 17:9-10).
Read Parts: I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX I got the call about 1:00 AM Sidney and Aunt MeMe were in a bad accident, I needed to get to the hospital right away. We’d last spoke around 11:00 PM, and she confirmed she’d arrive home around 12:30 AM. I waited for her, … Continue reading The Unexpected Proposition pt X
While it is acceptable to seek God for all things (Philippians 4:6), we should never develop a sense of entitlement regarding our faith. Our faith should implore us to seek first the Kingdom of YHVH and THEN all these things (things we want/need) shall be given to us (Matthew 6:33). We've gotten it confused. We seek God's hand first and God's face last...if at all.
Dear non-bipolar people: 1. Joking about bipolar disorder is not ok. You wouldn't find it funny if someone joked about something you battle with daily. 2. Just because you have mood swings doesn't mean you have bipolar disorder. Stop minimizing a serious issue...bipolar is WAY MORE than a damn mood swing. 3. STOP claiming bipolar … Continue reading Dear Non #Bipolar People
It's very easy to be seduced by the world, if you're not paying attention. And temptation isn't boisterous...it's subtle...cunning....and it isn't obvious. Temptation (if we aren't vigilant) can make us part with our values little by little...weakening us to the point that we have no strength left to fight when our ultimate temptation comes. First we compromise on small things...then we compromise on greater things.
You ever been in one of those places where you have no idea what God is doing in your life right now? And everything you want to happen, doesn't, while everything you don't want, does? Some days it's easy to remember how much God loves you, other days I wonder if God even likes me … Continue reading Does God Even Like Me?