Too Self Righteous?

Ok so today the topic of being “overly self-righteous” (or coming across that way to others) came up for discussion. It kind of bothered me because you know when you are living for God and people start to call you “self-righteous” that can be like a slap in the face, especially if it comes from others who are also walking serving God. I understand self-righteous to mean that you think you do no wrong and you look down on everyone else and judge them as unworthy and hell bound – in essence you think you are Christ and you carry on like the Sadducees and Pharisees of the bible. However some look at it as being “too holy” and having a biblical perspective on everything so much so that they can’t be themselves around you without feeling convicted or judged.  I guess the definitions vary depending on whom you are speaking to. But based on my definition of the word you can see why it bothers me so cause I know without a doubt I still got a lot of junk in me that needs working out and I don’t look down on or judge anyone (at least I try not to and don’t mean to but that doesn’t mean people don’t take things that way). And unfortunately, even when you say things from a place of love, support, and general encouragement – if a person is not ready to hear or receive these things, they just won’t take them the way they are put out there and it could create resentment and discord.
I went to God and said, show me Lord if I am indeed doing this so that I can stop and correct it. God certainly didn’t say I was “too holy” in fact, He encouraged me not to change my zeal, love, and fervor for Him for anyone. Yes, I try to be Christ minded all the time and I don’t allow me being human to try and cover me when acting out in the flesh. If being human were an excuse for sin then 1. Christ would not have died for us. (Romans 4:25) 2. We would not receive “new life” when we accept Christ (2 Corinthians 5:16-17, Colossians 2:13, Romans 12:2) and 3. God would not command us to do away with the things of this world and die to the flesh that we may walk by the Spirit. (Galatians 5:16-25, Romans 8:4, Ephesians 5:8). What He shared with me is that we all get to that place at a different point (something a wise woman I consider a mentor told me today) and though we may feel we are doing someone a favor by trying to urge them to that point a little sooner than later, sometimes it does more harm than good if the person isn’t ready to receive it (a word from a friend).  Simply put, many times – the best word is no word at all, just an open ear and a heart to pray afterwards.
There have been may times I’ve listened to people and though I wouldn’t throw scripture at them, I will often give a (what I think) to be a solution, or idea, or suggestion or otherwise to “fix” the problem (even from a non-spiritual perspective) or share something that happened to me (trying to relate and help them understand I’ve been there) and that’s not always needed, even if you mean well. Sometimes, our well-meaning actions can create more of a problem than there was to begin with. So I asked God well, what do we do? And He said, “Let the actions in your life be a light (Mathew 5:16) to those who are hurting…LOVE THEM because LOVE covers a multitude of sin” (1 Peter 4:8). At first, I thought that scripture meant love covers a multitude of sin only in the aspect that God would forgive them but now He’s helped me to see that it also covers sin by softening hearts, removing jealousy, taming tongues, resolving discord, healing hurts, and so much more. So God convicted me today in this area and I was grateful for it, thought I would share with others who may also need to hear this word that you may too get something from it.
For it is not our jobs to be people’s personal saviors, our job is just to love them – even when it’s difficult or you see them going through something that is hurting them …or even when they give you backlash, hurt you, or call you “too self-righteous” or “too holy”. Love them (sometimes that means quietly and without your advice, opinions, thoughts) and let God deal with the rest.  Here is the devotional I read that really blessed me in this area thought I’d pass it along: Crosswalk Devotional by Kelly Givens

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